I have been married 19 years, and just started an affair, I love my husband but ';want'; this man? any advice?

I met my new guy last year at a fire convention and it was like fireworks. We are both married and yet crazy for each other, but also content with life as it is. I have never done this before and now it has been going on over a year. I am a law professor and he a fireman and professional business owner. Why are two adults acting like love sick kids? I do not know who I am becoming? any one ever had something this insane going on?I have been married 19 years, and just started an affair, I love my husband but ';want'; this man? any advice?
You certainly don't love your husband enough. Do you know how devistatingly painful being cheated on is? I would not ever think of treating someone I profuse to love in such a way. So you are willing to take your husbands trust in you away and throw all your years together down the drain. Hope you are getting your jollies and it is all worth it for you; just so you are content that is really all that matters, isn't it?I have been married 19 years, and just started an affair, I love my husband but ';want'; this man? any advice?
The Bible says you reap what you sow. My dear...you better repent fast (confess and give up the sin). The both of you will lose your lives as you know it, not to mention your careers and your kids.
You should both leave your spouses - and don't see each other until you finish things with your spouses. This deception ALWAYS ends up hurting all kinds of people - not just your spouses when they find out. (And they always find out.)





There is nothing wrong with wanting your fireman - but you are not free to be with him and he is not free to be with you. Straighten out your lives first.
Could be that you are missing something in your marriage. Analyze and determine what you are lacking in the marriage and if you want to stay married to your husband, try to fix the problem. Of course you and your married lover will be crazy about each other because this is something new and exciting but I must warn you to be careful. Though you and the married lover are playing around and having fun, having an affair can cause a lot of hurt %26amp; anger which can lead to a bad situation.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
I think it's about time to leave your husband because he deserves better!
A law professor huh? And you aren't smart enough to realize that by doing this, you run the risk of losing everything? Even in a 50/50 state. Not to mention the emotional trama you are gambling with on the man you still claim to love. Grow up honey, your highschool days have long been over.





And here is a head's up on what (not who) you are becoming....a cheap whore who has lost the respect of mankind.





Hope this adds a little insight to help you focus more on your NEEDS, rather than your ';wants';, as you put it.
yeah, i have something like that going on in my life right now. my hubby cheated on me. let me tell you first hand what it's like for the other person. i can't lay in bed next to my hubby at night without wondering if he would rather it be her. i can't kiss his without wondering if he wishes i were her. i can't stop thinking about what she had that i don't. his affair has completely wrecked everything. our marriage, our home, and my sanity. please stop seeing this other man now. you have no idea how badly an affair destroys the other person.
Work on wanting your husband if not let him go..
Hope you have a good divorce lawyer you are gonna need it. I will try not to judge but you do know thats called ADULTERY.
You know what you're becoming and it's not nice.





You're playing with the lives of a lot of innocent people....grow up.
If your cheating on your husband, you don't love your husband, plain and simple because if you really truely loved him, you wouldn't have cheated on him. Think about how hurt your husband is going to be when he finds out, how betrayed. Think about those things before you think about your selfish self, and what you want. You should ALWAYS put your spouse and their feelings, and needs before your own, it's called being selfless. Try it sometime.
A law professor writing about being a cheater on Yahoo? You defined my opinion of lawyers.





Thank You.
you better leave your toy and concentrate on you kids you do have kids and your marriage or divorce your husband remember he will get the kid you will not you committed adultery he did not
this has been going on for a while and so it could mean you are really unsatisfied in your mariage (contrary to what you claim) or you are being a little selfish here i say so out of experience you are not insane you just need to get yourself in perspective you both have marriages which would sooner or later be destroyed by this do you want to lose your husband?If you don't do something about this quick ( talk to someone who can help you understand what you are missing in your marriage to make you go after soemone else. I know it seems like you are losing it but trust me all you need is a dose of reality to bring you back to earth this is going to lead to heartache; if you intend to keep your husband and this affair going on at the same time.you know your heart chose one or let em both go.You seem like someone who is an otherwise good woman don't get yourself in poor choiced situations that make you hate yourself or doubt your integrity. cheers
Repent
Have another drink kid.
If you like your life as it is and still loved your husband then you wouldn't be seeing this man to begin with. If you are going to continue to see him then leave your husband.
you are a whore. I feel sorry for your husband. Why don't you grow some balls and do him a favor by confessing then leaving. He would be a million times better off without you
My advice - it's only fantasy. Been there, done that, and it only causes pain and heartache for everyone involved. End it now with this other man before you are either discovered or do something stupid enough to ruin your life. I had an affair for 6 months with a man who I was absolutely ga-ga over, and we were discovered by his wife. She ruined my personal and professional life by telling the world what a horrible person I was, choosing not to keep it a private matter. I had to break my husband's heart and tell him. That was 9 months ago, and we have since gotten legally separated, moved from our beautiful home, were forced to remove our children from their prospective schools where they had already established strong friends and relationships, and are now forced to share custody in two different households, with two parents who are emotionally distraught. So not fair - for everyone involved. If only I had taken a good look at my relationship with my husband and tried to figure out WHY I wanted to have an affair, I would not be regretting what I had done, and would be repairing a loving relationship with the father of my children. Instead, I live a lonely and pain-filled life with the memories of what I used to have, and what I did to sabotage not only my life, but those of my children and husband. SO not worth it. Hindsight is 20/20 - please read what I have said and think about what you could sacrifice by being very selfish and not giving your 19-year marriage a chance to thrive by paying much-needed attention to it. Try counseling with your husband - painful but it pays off in the long run and creates a stronger bond with the one you once upon a time were love sick about. And by the way, I am still seeing the other guy - he too is getting divorced from his wife, and do you think he wants anything to do with my kids? No way - he's still in it for the fantasy. There is no chance of a future with him for me, so what have I gained? The realization that I can still have great sex? Wouldn't it have been fantastic if I had tried that with my husband?
Whats yer question? besides the insane thing going on?





I'm not giving you permission.





I suggest you forget the fantasy and start living reality , tell your husband what you have done and pray he forgives you , tell the sleaze bag who's using you for his own pleasure (cause sweet heart he wouldnt leave his wife even if you begged him to ) to nick off back to his wife and ring her and admit what you've done to her.





And get some damn self respect back and act your age , your not a teenager stop acting like it.





I am glad my kid's dont go to college I wouldnt want a professor teaching them when you can act so beligerantly.





What your becoming is a home wrecker.





You sound like my ex husband lover trying to explain away your childish selfishness.
You're making this up, right?





You don't cheat on people you love. Period.





And why would your professions even be relevant?
You have to think carefully why do you have to sacrifice your marriage for a man that you just know for a year.
Sometimes it happens...you can't deny what your heart and head.....and other parts.........:) tell you to do. Just keep in mind the risk of losing your husband and family if you are found out. No judgments from me....I have been happily married to ';my'; obsession or 16 years....so I have been exactly where you are.