I guess I am just looking for support as well... Thanks much!Need Advice: Husband threatened to 'smack' me during a recent fight...?
I think you need to talk to him about it and see what he says. My husband often does that choking motion (where he clinches his hands together as if he were choking something) when we fight, but I know he would never hurt me.
If he's the type to only say things out of anger, I wouldn't take much from it. But if he gets violent while he's angry, I definitely think it's something you two need to talk about.Need Advice: Husband threatened to 'smack' me during a recent fight...?
Actually I don't think that was a red flag. He was warning you to back off and you probably weren't listening. He knew he was at his limit and the only way to get you to pay any attention to him was for him to say something shocking. It doesn't sound like he lost control, got in a rage or has any other type of anger issue, it sounds like he just wanted you to STOP. Next time, don't push him so far.
You know EXACTLY what is wrong with this situation... I can read between the lines. Take a breath and get help now while this is still salvageable. You just need to learn how to communicate a little better. You are both frustrated.
Yes, I read that he threatened you and that is very wrong, still - I think that is recoverable so long as he did not actually do it.
Again, I am being very nice because of the kids, but you already know this!
Well you know, I wouldnt worry about it.. maybe he just thought you were hysterical and indeed, that is certainly a reasonable cure.... but I can say this.. you lost control of your emotions and your ability to communicate. If you remain civil, so your audience will remain more relaxed.
Perhaps he could have chosen the word ';spank'; which puts a light hearted edge on it... speak to him about that. Everyone likes a lil spanking dont they?
Sounds like your both dishing out a good share of abuse.
Yeah your right if he actually hits you, get out.
That is it, from there on it just gets worse.
Still men get all the crap for abuse, but women are just as bad, so check yourself, befor you start beating him up.
awww sweetie, you dont deserve this at all. do not deal with anymore of this guys crap! He is taking his anger out on you, he has no respect for you. please, move on and find a man who will really love you and not even think about hurting you!
get strong and move on. What does it mean, i will smack u, what is he, a low class man???
sorry what is a educated woman like u doing with him?
snap out of it, becuase some part of ur body gets broken, Have some respect for urself
You'll get smacked sure enough in time. Sounds to me like you need to 1) move on, 2) Keep your legs closed until the oldest child is out of the house. It's not about you anymore, it's about them.
Just stop it. You have kids. Be a good roll model. If you are pushing someones buttons then you need to stop. If he hasnt touched you just talk about it and say sorry.
Get out before it gets abusive!
Besides, that's the kind of stuff parents say to little kids, which means he probably thinks he's better than you.
What do you want to no, if hes threatening it will happen and you should leave before its to late..Talk to a councillor
Both of you need to give sobriety a try.
if he hasnt actually hit you then you two can still work this out..his warning to you proves he has self control and thats a good thing..alot of men see red , hit you, and then feel sorry they did it..your man saw red and was able to warn you..dont push him so far..during such a stressful time i think you two need to do your battling when both of you can think and act rationally..it would be a shame to have one of you lose control and say or do something that you wont be able to take back..maybe start by saying im sorry honey but i have reached the end of my wits and im sorry i said mean things but please dont threaten me and ill try not to get in your face so much..i love you but i need help raising these children and i dont ever want to fight like this again
Oh hon, you have to choose your battles. Good marriages dont just happen. You said the poor man is exhausted. I know I can say and do alot of things when I am tired that I dont mean to say or do.
You raised your voice and you knew he was tired. It needed to wait to a time when both of you could calmly discuss the problem.
Sweeite, life is hard. Its not fair and there are no guarrantees..sometimes it just plain sucks. But thsoe are the times you need to pull together. Do you remember why you married him? When was the last time you two went out on a romantic date night? It doesnt have to cost a lot of money but you have to nurture that prescious love so it can grow and blossom. A divorce is alot of pain an suffering and uses enormous energy. Use that energy to learn new skills. Nagging is not an aphrodisiac. Neither is him not listening to you. You two need to go directly to marriage counseling and hurry to save this marriage!!! Please find a good one. Its worth it if it saves your marriage. Good luck hon. Hang in there. You will figure things out. GO see the movie FIREPROOF at the theatre.
ok apparently you know when to back off, which is a good thing, but don't be a door mat. and for sure do not dare him to do it. I doubt he will do it. My husband and I have tied into it (knock down drag out), and that is all it took. we know our boundaries and we do not even threaten to hit on each other. sometimes it just takes the one time. but you do sound pretty stressed out. I am not saying go and knock the crap out of him but don't back down from him. Women have a habit of nagging and picking until men bleed. next time back off and go to another room, but if he does hit you, lay his *** out!
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