Alcoholic husband... Need Advice?

So I need an outside opinion so thought this would be a good place. My husband had a drinking problem before we met, he's always been an occassional drinker but just in the past 2 months he's been drinking a BIG bottle of vodka every two days. He goes through all my stuff, checks all my phone calls and yells at me alot. We have 3 kids and I don't want them to grow up without a father due to the drinking. I wanted to help and talking to him was doing nothing, so I emailed his sister to tell her what was going on and to see if I could get together with the family to talk about what was happening. Well she took the email copied and pasted it to her mom which is wrong because I sent it in confidence to her but whatever, my mother in law then copied and pasted it to an email to my husband saying look what she is saying about you. They know he had a drinking problem before why do they think I'm messing around about this. Well he got mad at me and annoyed at them which now is going to make the situation worse. I emailed his sister and mom yesterday and asked them why they would email that to him, this is something serious that he needs to be sat down with to talk about. Well they got all upset that I told them it was wrong to send that to him and they broke my trust and for now on they would not get any emails from me about anything. They needed to talk to him to get any information about the kids or anything else. They called him and were like she is awful and we do not like her and she is wrong and all this stuff about me. I WANT MY HUSBAND TO LIVE A FULL LIFE AND TO WATCH HIS KIDS GROW UP. They just made the situation way worse and I don't know what else to do to make him get better, I can't do it alone. They just hate me and I guess don't care if he kills himself from drinking. Was I wrong to email them to tell them they were wrong to email that to him? What do I do next? How do I help him?Alcoholic husband... Need Advice?
just a guess.. talk to him really early in the am after he gets up.. about it.. sounds like he doesnt trust you, if u like some eye drops in his liqour the night before should keep him sober enough to try and save your marrageAlcoholic husband... Need Advice?
Alcoholics travel in packs... there is more than one in his family and the ones who aren't are co-dependent enablers. You should not have gotten them involved. They are defending him. It's their ';role'; in the alcoholism. Everyone has one.





When I met my husband I'd already been in a long term relationship with an alcoholic and my father/brother are as well. When I saw the red flags I told him no friggin way and that I was leaving. He said he'd get help for me. My response was, you can't get help ';for me'; it has to be ';for you'; or it will never work and you are in denial there even IS a problem since you've been ';doing it for others'; for years now and failing. I said I wished him well but I need not to have that in my life. I was the first person who refused to enable him. I refused to see it as a disease. I refused to feel sorry for him or to scream and yell and give ultimatums.





He's been sober for 3 years now. His mom/brothers/sister etc all said it would never last. They said he's done this before and always goes back. They are stunned but still try to tell me he will do it again. Whatever. I am not sure why it worked this time. Maybe because I didn't give him a choice - stop or lose me... I said you lost me babe... period.





There isn't a lot you can do for him if he doesn't think he has a problem. He won't do it for himself or you and everyone else is helping him think his behavior is normal and yours isnt.





Maybe you can attend al-anon meetings, for family members of acoholics. They will help you decide what to do. OR not to do.
How do you help him? You leave...you take the children and bounce. I know that's not your idea of helping him, but he needs help and in order for him to get help, he has to know he needs it. right now he doesn't.





in the meantime, find a local Al-Anon group that you can go to. it's for the families of alcoholics where you can process what you're going through. you may even find other resources that can help.





bottom line, he's not going to get better unless he wants to get better. there is no ';cure'; for alcoholism. the same was he became addicted is the same way he has to come un-addicted. and it takes a lot of time.





i'm not suggesting divorce, i'm suggesting separation. that's what he really needs.





good luck.
say this prayer together so you can get to know God and He can help you, if you are embarrassed say it alone in your room etc. (I can assure you He will hear you!) Go ahead put aside your unbelief and say it!


God can help you, If only you ask Him.


If you want to accept Christ as Savior and turn from your sins, you can ask Him to be your Savior and Lord by praying a prayer like this:


';Lord Jesus, I believe You are the Son of God. Thank You for dying on the cross for my sins. Please forgive my sins and give me the gift of eternal life. I ask You in to my life and heart to be my Lord and Savior. I want to serve You always.'; Amen


He helped me and I want you to feel his Love too.


Then take a few seconds to print it out and give it to others so they may be Blessed by His presence also. :)
This is why you don't involve inlaws in your marriage blood is thicker than water.
I am guessing he has other alcoholics in his family.





That is why all the dysfunctional crap is going on.





Talking to him isn't going to do anything.





You need to find an Al Anon group in your area.