My husband has wanted a dog for quite some time. But, we have a 19mo old, we both work full time and we are on a tight budget. I've never had a dog, but from talking to people, I feel that we can't really afford it (time or money) and that with as much as we are out of the house, it wouldn't be fair to the puppy. Any opinions, or suggestions on how to help my husband understand my point of view w/o a major argument. (PS- I understand that this is NOT a life or death question and that a lot of people have worse things to worry about. I'm just looking for some outsiders opinions.)My husband wants a puppy, but I don't think we are ready. Advice?
its only a puppy.. why are you making a big deal out of it. just leave him alone why'll you workMy husband wants a puppy, but I don't think we are ready. Advice?
I have a 2 year old and it is very hard to keep up with her and our 2 year old dog. I would wait untill the child is old enough to walk and help with the dog. You don't have to buy a specific breed you should go to your local humane society to look for a puppy if you aren't picky. There will be all sizes. If this is causing arguments DON';T get the dog untill you know you are ready. You will take aggression out on the dog and blame it if you didn't truly want it to begin with.
just say what you wrote under your question, and don't say it in a mean way, tell him you can get a puppy later when you have more time and are more secure finacially.
I think it would be a huge mistake for you to get a puppy right now - the main reason being that you're going to resent this puppy right from the beginning! And no matter what's promised, it's the woman who ends up being the main care giver - feeding, grooming, training, etc.
On the other hand, I've always felt sorry for those kids who have to grow up without a dog - they miss so much on so many levels. But, some people aren't meant to be dog owners and I think you'd be doing a puppy a huge disservice by getting one now.
Wait a while, one day the timing will be better and your future dog will be better off if BOTH of you want it.
Yes you are right a puppy can be expensive and it does take up some of your time. the first vet visit usually runs 65.00 plus heart worm med and deworming. and every 6 months you go the vet for more heart worm med and the check up runs 40.00 and then there is the cost of the grooming they charge by the size of the dog, smalls dog starts at 15.00 that does not include the tick and flea dip. you need to do these things even if it is an outside pet or inside pet. oh and do not for get the dog house and hay in the winter time, in the house you will net a gate.
I don't believe anyone should get a pet unless everyone in the household is in agreement, otherwise you run the risk of tention and resentment.
I have a couple options you could try.
You could try fostering a dog for your local rescue. They are always needing temperary homes for dogs. That way you will know how a dog will fit into your life and if it doesn't work out, you can always give it back to the rescue.
You could agree to get a hamster or some other type of animal that is very low maintence.
If your husband is willing, you could get a cat instead. They don't need a lot of attention and they pretty much take care of themselves as long as you leave food, water and a clean litterbox for them.
Good luck!
Men have a habit of only seeing there opinions.
My husband wants a puppy too but don't feel it's the right time. I am a stay at home mom to a four year old boy, who is always on the go. My husband works any where from 70 to 80 hours a week. So in turn it would become another thing for me to take care. I want to wait until are son is old to help out. And I suggest the same for you. Not only so its not all you taking care of the puppy but it's dangers to have puppies around babies. What if your child pulls the dogs tail and he.she bites you child, and there is a ton of other things that can happen. In my opinion wait and don't fight over something to stupid.
Let him buy it, and let him take care of it. Just tell him that. Tell him, that you have no time to be a part of it. So let him buy it, and if it gets on his nerves, he will get rid of it anyway.
Psychologically the more you stop someone from doing something, they just want to do it just for heck of it. So let him have it. If he's good enough, he can take care of it. But I doubt it.
For e.g if you want a cat, and if your husband says no, won't you be bothered about it. So have mutual respect. Not slave respect.
If you feel that you can't commit financially to a dog right now, your husband needs to respect that. Between bonding and potty training, dogs require a lot of attention, at least at first. It would be unfair to the animal to be left home alone all day long. You wouldn't do that to your baby, why should a dog be treated any different? My suggestion: if you decide that you want a dog too, try saving a little money every month and adopt an older dog from a shelter that's already housetrained and has a calmer disposition, which will make you all a lot happier than s yapping, chewing, house-wrecking puppy.
Maybe there is some room for compromise? You may be the one who ends up most attached to the dog if you get one.
Yes, it is true that this is a big commitment needing time and training. If it is possible to get your dog enrolled in an insurance plan which some Vets and Clinics offer, that can help with expenses. Also, if it is possible to have someone come in and take the dog out for a midday break while in training, that would be good too. If there is a way to swing this, it doesn't necessarily break the bank to own a dog.
Discussing these things ahead of deciding on a puppy might resolve the problem. Your husband may decide it is best to wait right now or you might decide together that it is too big of a commitment at the time. In any case, happy holidays whether you get a puppy or not!
They say that you should first buy a plant, if you can keep the plant alive you can can then buy fish, if you can keep fish alive then but a hamster, if you can keep a hamster alive then you can then buy a cat, if you keep the cat alive then you can move on to the dog, then they say that if you keep the dog alive you move on to having kids, well since you started backwards you might want to wait and see if you can keep the kid alive then move on to the Dog, cat, hamster, fish, plant.............Hope that helps, might want to make sure kid is not allergic to pet dander.
a puppy is a lot of responsibility and with a toddler the pup wouldn't get the attention it needs.they are a lot of work as well as fun you should wait and when you do decide to get one start with a dog,there are so many out there that need a good home and they are usually housebroken and know some basic commands.dogs are great companions but they require love and attention just like most living creatures
If both of you cannot agree do not take a puppy! You both have to live with it and you will also need to take care of it. It must be a mutual agreement for you you husband you child and the puppies sake
Puppies are a lot of work, and so that they do not become intolerable, aggressive, and chew everything and poop everywhere, they need to be trained. Training takes time, and it's very difficult to accomplish in between meal preparation, diaper changes, quality time with the human baby, and any time at all with your spouse.
This is a life that we're talking about, and puppies deserve to have a home where people have time to play with them and train them. Check out all of the questions in the Pets forum from people who say their dog doesn't mind, is biting or trying to bite their baby, chews everything, pees everywhere. If you don't want to be writing one of those questions in a few weeks, I'd hold off on the dog purchase until someone has more time to spend with the puppy.
An alternative would be to look for a laid-back adult dog. They would be beyond chewing and digging, already housebroken and out of the frantic puppy stage.
Generally speaking, larger dogs don't depend on human companionship as much as smaller dogs do, and will be more content to sit and wait in an empty house for the family to come home. It certainly varies from dog to dog and breed to breed, but that's a generalization.
Don't apologize...it's an important issue, especially at the holidays; and the bulk of the questions on here are certainly about less important things than this. Good question!!!
My girlfriend and I had that same dilemma...do we get a puppy or not? I wanted a puppy so bad, I couldn't stand it. She wanted to wait. We both work full time and just bought a house, so we were a little bit strapped for cash and time, just like you guys seem to be. I say DON'T GET A PUPPY. OMG, they take up so much of your time if you want to raise them right. If they don't get plenty of attention (individual attention) they develop bad habits, dig in trash, tear up furniture, chew on things, claw at carpet, soil the carpet, dig in the yard, bark incessantly, you get the picture, I'm sure. On the other hand, if you have plenty of time to devote to raising the dog, get one. There's no harm in waiting until your child is a few years old to get a dog. Then, the kid can enjoy the puppy as much as the adults do. AND you can have more time to take your immediate attention away from your child for a few minutes at a time to train the puppy basic commands, like sit, stay, come, and most importantly, ';NO.'; I'm serious. I wish I had waited to get ours, because we now have a very nice, sweet dog who we love very much, but who also has some serious behavioral issues that we could have avoided if we had waited to get a dog just a few more years.
you could get a dog that don't need to constantly be around humans and is good with kids.i have a golden retreiver adn she is wonderful. but get a male dog.females are VERY emotional
Kudos to you for seeing the puppy perspective on this. I can totally understand the desire for a dog, but without the ability to make other commitments, it is not worthwhile. I also understand, that when a husband is set upon buying a dog, it becomes difficult to talk them out of it.
1. Ask a friend whether you can baby sit their dog for a few days, if they are going out of town. Ask your husband to be its caretaker. Usually, people lose a bit of enthusiasm after this.
2. Show him pictures of dogs that ended up in shelters because the families did not have time to take care of them. Your husband sounds like a dog lover, and this may resonate with him.
3. Give him a time line. When such and such happens- we will adopt. That way he realizes it is the TIMING you are opposed to and not the puppy itself. I told my husband we will adopt a puppy when our combined household income rose by 10,000 K. When it did, we adopted out puppy.
On the other hand - if you are worried about time and money but don't mind getting a dog:
Think about adopting an older puppy (6 months plus) or an adult dog, which will adjust to you being away during the day, as long as you provide him with enough attention, exercise and love when you are back.
We adopted out first dog when my son was 19 months old. With certain precautions, it worked well. We did the puppy wellness plan at Petsmart (banfield) and for 19 bucks a month, everything form shots to neutering was taken care off. With good daily care, you reduce the potential of bank breaking illness/accidents. Because the money is staggered, we did not feel the pinch.
No way ... it's not fair to the animal or to you. You should never own a dog if you're not home to watch it. And your budget has no room for the extra food %26amp; vet bills either.
You're absolutely right, it isn't fair to the puppy. Puppies need just as much care and loving as children. A puppy who is alone in the house all day will be lonely and miserable, not to mention the fact that training a puppy takes time and effort. I see far too many puppies come into rescue because people didn't THINK, before they brought them home.
Wait until your toddler is older, and you both have more time to spend with a dog. Then you will all enjoy the experience of having a dog together.
How about a compromise? Go to a local shelter where they know at least some of the history of the dogs they offer. Ask their advice (in front of your husband to avoid arguments) if they think it would be unfair to leave the dog alone during the day. Some dogs are fine as long as they have toys to play with, and some dogs just wig out and destroy the place or cry constantly. Mature dogs take less time to train, are past chewing on everything, and you already know what kind of personality it has. It gets rid of the guesswork. Getting a medium sized dog is preferable; it won't cost an arm and a leg to feed him, and yet will be large enough to handle being loved on by a toddler. If you get a dog that can handle being alone during the day, it will be more than worth it. Nothing beats coming home at the end of a long day to a furry loved one that wants nothing more than a bowl of food and a lot of love. Good Luck to you and Blessings...
you may not be able to afford it but it will get your child use to a dog and they will not e scared when they get olde..
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