Need advice on husband who is never home!!?

My husband and I have two different personalities....he likes to go fishing, hunting or even work on the weekend. It makes me feel insecure because he doesnt want to spend time with us (my son and I) it seems like. LAst weekend I sat at home all weekend. This happens every weekend unless I get a babysitter and come with him. I love spending time with our son..so I dont get a babysitter much. Needless to say I am not happy..I want a husband to WANT to be at home and be a family man. He says he cant change. Am I asking too much of him?


My family is all about 300 miles away and all of his family is here. I went home for a week and he was flipping out! So I really dont have any support other than friends and his family. I need my husband! I do still loove him but are we just too different?


He says that he would never move around my family..even if it would make me happy..which i dont really expect him to but it would be nice if he considered it since he is gone all the time.Need advice on husband who is never home!!?
i'd like to start by saying to you, kudos for staying and being worried about your marriage and not cheating or going outside of you r marriage to fix what's going on inside of your marriage.. HOWEVER, your husband is a very selfish person. And you allow it. I'm sorry but you do. You teach people how to treat you. And you've taught him that no matter what he does or how dismissive he is of your feelings your going to stay. I can almost guarentee that you have told him all of this till you were blue int he face, which makes this situation very sad to me. I dont want to say that he dont care, but if it quacks like a duck.... If he is the macho man that he portrays, then, all the macho men i know take care of home first. It sounds like he's only taking care of himself. And it sounds like he's unhappy as well, because any person happy in they're marriage wouldnt spend so much time away from it. It sounds like you have two options 1. Both of you go to marriage counseling (both have teo be willing, dont nag him to go because then he wont want to be there and he wont get anyhting out of it) or 2. Pack up you and your son, file for a seperation (and if he's not willing to work on it then) then file for divorce. Your life and your sons life is entirely to precious for you to be unhappy. And although you love him, love yourself enough to want more and be happy. Move closer to YOUR family. Dont force him or ask him to move. You two can move to where his family is 150 miles away and yours is 150 miles away. my saying that is to say, there has to be a happy medium. you cant be the only one compromising. For once in your life, think about yourself. in certain situations, it's totally the right thing to do..Need advice on husband who is never home!!?
I do think that people sometimes are complete opposites and that they don't bring out the best in each other. i think if you guys love each other that you both should make concessions for one another. i think the statement that he is who he is and can't change is BS. If he loves you and your son like he should he would consider making some changes. Your happiness counts, you need to do what is good for you and your son. Good luck.
';well,,are their types of men that are family men and like to stay with their families or is this a myth?';





There sure are! I'm married to one of them.





I don't think that you can change people to be who you want them to be. All you can do is change you or the situation.
I think you sound like a nice responsible person and he sounds like a complete ***. I dont think this guy is ever going to be what you really want. If he dosent even want to spend time with his baby boy now, do you ever think he is going to. You and your son deserve so much better. There are tons of guys who would love to be at home with there babies.


Kick his *** to the curb, and find your self a real man.
Drinking a driving is dangerous to everyone...not just one year olds. Go with them, bring the little one and be the designated driver. It sounds like neither of you are willing to make the efforts needed to spend time together. If he won't, you need to. Plus it would probably be good for you and your son to get out of the house.
I wonder this same thing about my husband, I am just taking it one day at a time. I am sure that he is a good man. Have a discussion with him about his priorities. Tell him that your son is not going to be this small for long. Then you need to reevaluate your needs and wants. If you are truly unhappy then you have to do what is best for you and your well being. Good luck!!
Its not a myth. There are men who love to spend time with not just their families but their wives. I have the same problem but in reverse. My wife is always out and about and I am with my daughter sometimes at home.





I pick my battles as far as trying to bring a happy balance into the home. It sounds like your situation is VERY VERY one sided. not fair at all
I really suggest more girls night out and stick the kid with him for the day. It's the only way he's going to learn. After all, you're dealing with a guy who has yet to mature into a husband/father. Unless he's forced to take charge in that manner you're fighting a hopeless battle.
you are letting your husband control you. you need something for yourself. he sounds very insicure. if you can not even visit your family. then that is a problem. if he loved you. he would honer your family they are apart of who you are. you need to find you. do not let your husband define who you are.
Sounds like you married a selfish little boy in a man's body. He is missing his son growing up and is to much of a fool to notice.





I suggest marriage counseling as things will not take care of themselves and you both have to sit down and communicate.





Good luck.
I like to stay home with my family. I also don't like doing things with out them.





Hey we are the same... I am the type of guy you are looking for. ..maybe we should hook up.





Wait, I'm married and your married. Dang it I hate that when that happens.





See... we are out there.
many guys dont like babies, they like sons when they are old enuf to play and wrestle and play catch with.





men arent domestic like women. he sounds like a very much mans man, in his attitudes.





i wish you could do some counseling, it might help both of you understand each other.
wel one day when he leaves i would leave take ya son to the family spend the weekend ............ then leave ya son their for a week like vocation then go home and when he ask questions dont answer any do things that would make him up set and act like u dont care even thoe u do................ if this dosnt work u got things up ya seleves
Can't say it enough go to alanon....hear from people that know what you a going through....maybe this marriage can be saved once you have the tools first talk to someone and make a informed decision





all the best
your husband or should i say roommate needs to grow up and stop hanging out with the boys. he needs to hang with his wife and son. sorry to say if not move on because he'll never be there for you and your son. good luck
You can't make someone be who they aren't. Rather than finding a babysitter take your son along on his little trips when he goes. It will be good for all of you to get out of the house.
He can't change means he WONT change.





It is pathetic that this man chose to spend Fathers Day away from his kiddo...Pathetic, no-good weasel.





I could not live nor respect a man like this...and I think you deserve better.





Good luck.
You knew him before you married him that sums it all up, i just graduated high school last year and i know this.
change the locks next time he leaves once a control freak always a controll freak he will never change
You sound too controlling. Release your grip or watch him walk away.
Your not married to a man...that's a spoiled boy! Advice is if you plan on staying with him forever you better just get use to THIS IS THE WAY IT IS !!
Um..hello... if you want to have a husband who wants to be home, you have to make home a nice place to be!
My sister's ex-husband was just like this, hence the ';EX';.
should have test drove him longer before getting married. You will do better on the next guy. He does sound selfish
He sounds controlling and very selfish. I assume you have one car and he takes it, leaving you home w/ the baby transportless.(right?) Do what is best for you and you're child regardless of how he feels. If he cared so much he wouldn't leave you home alone all the time. Move close to your family if you need the help but get away from him. Only more hurt and loneliness will come from you hanging around. He doesn't want a wife he wants a rag doll who does what he says when he says it. Good luck to you.
Your husband is not a smart man. If I could talk to him believe me not only would he be spending more time with you but he would be more than happy to allow you to spend time with your family.





This is a situation where a guy needs to have a man to man talk with him. Maybe he has a brother you are close with or maybe his best friend or his father or a respected old timer or maybe even a minister. If there is no one then try marriage counseling even though I doubt he'll go. He has grown too comfortable for his own good and needs a good talking to. Good luck.
My husband is the same way. When we first go together I knew all those things he liked doing (things I don't like to do) and he likes to work as much as possible. I have tried explaining to him that he should WANT to be home with his family as much as he can like cut his every Saturday at work down to every other Saturday or instead of going fishing every weekend go every other weekend. But it didn't work. The truth is I knew how he was when I married him and now I either have to accept it or leave him and move on. So you have to do the same. You can't change him and trying to change him is only going to make the both of you and your child unhappy. So like I said you have two choices... stay and deal with it or leave.
Look at your very first sentence...';My husband and I have two different personalities';......knowing this you still CHOSE to marry him. By marrying him you ultimately accepted his behavior and now you want to change it? not gonna happen. You have 2 choices, stay and accept him as he is with NO complaing or leave. Up to you.
You are his wife, you should support him in all that he does. OH cry me a river if you are unhappy. You married him, deal with it. If you don't like it, then leave, but quit your whinning. I bet he is dead tired of your moaning and groaning at him.
That is just what being married is. You need to at least try and like some of the things that he does so that you can spend time with him. Tell him not to drink so much and then you can take your son.
He is probably cheating