Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Desperate for advice about husband and porn?

My husband looks at porn, though I am not happy about it I have definitely come to terms with it and never mention it. We had an understanding that I don't care about it as long as I don't have to see what he has been looking at. Today I came home from work and he left shortly after for work, and I clicked on ';open all recently closed tabs'; in the internet browser. I found several websites where he has been looking at TEEN porn, girls that are OBVIOUSLY young, I am guessing about 12-13 yrs old. I have no way to get ahold of him, and I don't even want to. We are young (I'm 24, he's 23) and have only been married 7 months. He is a computer tech and is supposed to report anyone who looks at stuff like this, but HE is doing it! I am disgusted, and totally ashamed that my husband is obviously a pervert. PLEASE can someone PLEASE give me some advice here? I have a terrible case of the shakes right now and am extremely confused... please help..Desperate for advice about husband and porn?
Most porn is made in California. There, it is legal to pose for porn at age 18 and up. So-called ';teen'; sites put up pictures of young women who are either 18 or 19 years old. They go to great lengths to make the girls appear even younger than they are. To this end, they typically choose females with small breasts, and/or who wear braces. They put their hair in pig tails, give them lollipops to suck on, and photograph them on beds with stuffed animals, in front of walls with Jonas Brothers and High School Musical posters on them.





I'd be willing to bet that your husband was looking at the kind of legal porn I described above. Please, stop freaking!Desperate for advice about husband and porn?
you need to get out of that relationship before his infatuation with young girls goes too far. for one thing he should be happy with you and what you look like. he shouldnt be looking to other women for his sexual desires. second, he shouldnt be doing something to you that obviously hurts you in anyway. third, if he is looking at something like that on the computer, he is looking at the same thing in the real world and there is no telling what that will lead him to do.
Nothing wrong with porn, but underage porn is very serious business. Look at the sites, make sure it is underage girls, an call the cops. Child pornography is sick and illegal. Who knows what he is doing outside the home, as well. For all you know, he could be messing with, or god forbid, raping, underage girls behind your back.
I would confront him about the teen porn... that is pretty sick, but maybe he's never seen it before and was just curious? That's why i would confront him on it now while it's fresh on your mind. Hopefully he will stop after you shame him a bit. If he doesn't stop then you will know he has a problem and then you can decide whether the marriage is really worth it.


Sorry, i realize you're having a pretty crappy day- hang in there!
You should not be confused. This is to be expected. That is what porn is all about, destruction of relationships and perversion. Maybe I am not the person to give advise as I am a very drastic person and one strike with me and they are out. I am the type of person that once a man shows any signs of pervertion, unfaithfulness, or lack of love...my love and respect for them flyes out the window never to return.
oh that sounds horrible, I wouldn't be able to be in the same room as him. I am a very moral person, but god, he doesn't deserve you. And also I would never accept my husband looking at porn, especially in my house. Appreciating an attractive person is one thing, but looking at stuff like that is I dont know what....
when a porn site says teen porn. Chances are it's girls OVER18 who happen to look young. If it says pre teen then you have a problem. look at the sites again and it will say somewhere that all models are over 18. Dozen hand jobs!!! Damn girl. Why can't i find a girl like you
Is he saving any and then trading them with others over the Internet?





You may want to report him to the police and let them have the computer. It might mean the end of your marriage, though.





You have my sympathy.
I highly doubt they were 12-13 as that would be an illegal site. Settle down already! Maybe if YOU took better care of him in the bedroom, he wouldn't need the porn.





If it is that much of a deal breaker, JUST LEAVE! Again, life isn't that hard.....
i think u should express that it hurts u and tell him that u want a more pure relationship with him. tell him that it would make u feel good and a turn on for you knowing u urself is the only woman he sees naked and in that manner.
Call the police and pack your things before he comes home. That is seriously sick. He needs help. If you had planned on children I'm very sorry, but you don't want to have children with a man that is attracted to tweens.





ETA: Do not confront him. He will delete it before the police can see it. Call the police before he gets home from work!
See looking, at porn is one thing, but looking at Child Pornography is disgusting. He needs to be reported for his actions.
I'd like to know what websites he's looking at that he's seeing 12 %26amp; 13 year old girls...Most of those ';teen'; websites use women that are of age but look young.
They could be 18 year olds that look younger. I do not believe a site with 12-13 yer olds would be accessible. Not knowing for sure what your looking at, I would say nothing until/unless I was sure they are under age girls.
go hide the PC somewhere outside your house, then keep it as a blackmailing tool to get whatever you want.
Im sorry But you need to report him
You need to report him. You know it's not right!
KT, You are just gonna have to follow your heart. I can't tell ya what to do. I wouldn't be suprised if its adults that really look young. My sister in law when she married my brother was 18 and seriously looked 12. Anyways. You could tell him how you feel. My husband has made comment after comment that he has everything he has ever wanted at home with me. No need for him to be looking elsewhere. Now remember, people will say ';its just porn, its not like he's being unfaithful';. When YOUR husband is LOOKING at OTHER women besides YOU, he in a womans line of site is unfaithful emotionally.


Don't need to leave just yet, have it up on the computer when he gets home and explain to him that it bothers you. You didn't think it would but as time goes on, it does. Take care
Well first I am sorry for you that he is doing this.... you don't deserve that. Second, what he is doing is illegal and should be reported. You never know how far this will go. He may be deeper into than you know by actually seeking young girls. I would report it turn over the computer and let things take its course. I'm really sorry that your husband has turned out to not be the man you thought but you are young still and have a full life ahead of you.... don't waste it on him. Good luck in what ever you choose to do.
The models he's looking at are probably 18-19 or so, but just look young. No website is going to go through the legal problems of having underaged models when there are plenty of legal-aged models that look young.





But anyway, to answer your question. When my dog starts to chew furniture, I use substitution--I give her a chew toy or rawhide bone. Maybe you can use substitution--take some porn of yourself, and be more sexually aggressive and adventurous. It may not work, but it's worth trying.
There are no websites that have underage porn. A lot of teen porn is 18 and 19 yr old girls who look young. The younger the better because that's what the customers want. The girls you saw are 18+ and just happen to look young. They might even be 21 or older. They can lie about her age as long as they are not saying a 17 or younger girl is 18+.





Also, if you don't want to see what he looks at, don't open all recently closed tabs. That's just stupid. And just so you know, sometimes he could be looking at one thing and another tab will just pop up with an ad for something totally different. He could be looking at MILF porn and an ad for barely legals will pop up. Doesn't mean he was looking for barely legals.





If you REALLY came to terms with the porn thing, start acting like it and not just saying it.
I know porn can be a touchy subject for many. I look at it once in a while and my husband has no interest in it. I admit that I shouldn't. I just want to tell you that I think it's not a big one to worry about. Your husband is just over-sexed and can't get enough of it. I think people watch it just to get off over and over (I know it sounds sick, but it's the truth!) As for the teen stuff.. most of those websites will state anything to get you to click on. I guarantee you those girls are not underage or that company would be heading for shutdown and prison. You ought to go look for yourself. They look like like 30 year old woman made up to look teeny, but it's all a crock.


I think some people watch it out of boredom and entertainment, too. Ya, it's sick, but that's the truth girl! Hell, my whole family knows my 75 year old father is always snuck off to watch it. We all act innocent and say that dirty ol perv! Than like I said I watch it, too. It's just one of those things. I wouldn't flip out over it like you have.
I'm so sorry - how horrible. I would suggest making a copy (either hard or soft) of what you've found - that way if he clears his computer log you still have whatever you need if you decide to go forward and report him. Then I would ask him about it. If his answer is weak or you sense avoidance or other evasion, then I'd go ahead and report him, even though it will probably be the most difficult thing you may have done.





Think of this - what happens if he does have serious criminal and psychological issues and you have a child together... what then?
For all those people that say that those girls cant possibly be 12-13, or that he couldnt access those sights because they are illegal you are all wrong. Just because they are illegal doesnt mean you cant find them. He is an IT tech and I am sure he can find those sights.





As to your question as to what to do. Your husband is sick, nothing you can do will change this. This is the first step a pedophile takes on the road to abusing some poor helpless child. You NEED to confront him and if he refuses to get help you NEED to report him. IF you dont, you may be unwittingly enabling him to molest some poor child in the future.
NO PLEASE DON'T POST THE LINKS


HI, I surely know how you feel about it, i am 36 and i to have a husband who looks at porn with teenagers in it and i think it is SICK STUFF, and i can say that it does get better, i mean if it is meant to be with yall and he is not acting on this um i could understand more on why is looking a teenagers, but kids like 12 that is weird and well, my husband is 37 and looks at young women in there 20's and maybe they are younger than that...he should def not be looking at 12 yr girls
I personally don't like porn, and would never settle for my husband looking at it or having it in the house here!! I think it's disgusting!! Theres no need for it. And YOU my dear shouldn't settle for less because your husband views it. BUT 12 and 13 year old girls!!! That IS sick!!!! I would confront the sick son of a *****. I would be SO DISGUSTED!!!! I don't know what advice I can give you but to let him know YOU know!!!!!!!!!! Then take it from there. I would not be happy about this situation at all!!!!!!!! And my dear%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;don't say you've come to terms with him looking at porn??? Just because other people don't mind looking at it, doesn't mean you have to feel the same way!!! You have the right to feel any which way you want. And if you don't like something, then say so!!!!!!!! Don't act like it's ok when it's not. Speak up!! You have every right not to want that TRASH in your home!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'd be VERY CONCERNED about the young girls??? You people crack me up on here! saying that you don't believe these girls are 12 or 13!!! Are you saying the porn industry is on the UP AND UP and they don't USE young girls!!!!! Well your full of SH*T!!!!!!!!!!! It's the porn indusrty. They will use what ever they can as long as it sells!!!! It happens every day in the good old U S A!!!!!! And in other countrys. So don't go give this lady bullsh*t the way some of you have on here!!! The chances of these girls being that youing is QUITE POSSIBLE!!!! because of you sick son of a bitc*es out there who want to view this TRASH!!! Thats why these young girls are doing this!!! YOUR ALL A BUNCH OF SICK BAS*RARDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


HEY VIDEO PRODUCTION!!!!!!!! PORN IS PORN!!!! whether it's child porn or adult porn!!! It'a ALL SICK!!!!!!!!!!!!


GEEZ%26gt;%26gt;%26gt; Let me guess?? It couldn't be the sicko porn freaks that are giving me the thumbs down could it??? NAW??? I must be wrong??? LOL LOL

No comments:

Post a Comment