There is nothing invested in this marriage. Should I feel guilty about wanting to leave? What other things should I be thinking about while I am pondering what to do?I think I want to divorce my husband. Any advice?
I had the EXACT same situation with my ex-husband. If you are miserable - get out of the marriage. Everyone deserves to be happy. It's not fair to you or your husband to stay in an unhappy relationship.
Screw all the people who talk about the vows. People make mistakes. You should do what makes you happy.I think I want to divorce my husband. Any advice?
As for whether you should feel guilty you might consider whether or not you took a vow at the time you were married that you would take him to be your husband for all time? You should also consider whether he has maintained his vows to you and you have maintained your vows to him.
If you have kept your promises or he has not kept his you should have not guilt.
Ending a marriage can be painful. Try to be fair.
I wouldn't feel guilty. All I can really ask is, what is it that made you want to marry him in the first place? If you can't think of any other reason other then ';we fell in love';, or if you were doing it to prove your family wrong, then I'd maybe just try a separation, not a divorce for now. Move out, and maybe stay with a friend for a little while (don't invest in a new place yet, as you'll need to save money for a divorce if you choose to do so.)
Good Luck.
I would tell you to bounce but I can't help from wondering how you got here in just one year. Are you telling us the whole story? Were you smoking crack when you got married? If things could flip to the extreme so quickly, how do we know that they won't change the other way too? I say separate but keep the door open for potential improvement for a while before you actually divorce. Who knows, the chic he married may just decide to show up again.
Well sorry, but I have to echo, ';why did you marry him in the first place?'; Aside from that, you may be able to get an annulment. I have heard of it happening with people who were married longer than you. Personally, I got a no fault - no contest divorce and everyone ended up happy and not a single lawyer made a dime on the deal. All you have to do is go to the county court and ask for the papers. Some court offices will resist, play dumb, (';What papers? Never heard of them!';) as they are more or less in cahoots with the lawyers. I had a paralegal help me through the legalese. All together it cost less than $1,000.00 and we didn't have lawyers goading us to fight.
You are doing the right thing - It's time to make these kinds of decisions while you don't have kids - One slip up and out pops a kid and your decision just became incredibly difficult to say the very least! Do the therapist and then make a decision to stay or punt. Being a martyr in a marriage and staying doesn't do your spouse any good.
Looks like you wanted to be a nurse and ended up in law school. How in the world did you get to marry this guy that you have no feelings for? You must know the reason. There is nothing to think about other than mutual love for each other, and it is obvious your portion has run out. Don't stop seeing the therapist after you divorce.
Therapy is essential. Not only individual therapy but marital as well. Its good that you are not jumping into this decision, you are clearly thinking about your next move. That shows intelligence and you should be proud of yourself. Most people just jump into divorce as quick as they can when things get tough.
You said it was too soon to marry. Have you tried getting to know him, I mean really getting to know him? Go on dates again. It sounds lame but it makes a HUGE difference. Go do something he likes one week, then something you like the next. Make a promise not to talk about anything negative, only positives. You'll be surprised at how much it will help.
Getting a divorce is pretty big. If you feel that you might still have a chance at working things out, you two should go to marriage counseling or something to work things out. But if you seriously can't work things out, and you aren't happy with him and don't think you ever will be, the I would get a divorce.
Yes you should feel guilty. You haven't made any effort yet. A year is like a little blip. Most inlaws don't like their kids' spouses... I'll bet 70% or more. And when most people get married, they not only have no assets, they have DEBT.
You need to figure out how to keep moving forward within your marriage.
And about the sex thing, you're a freak just like my wife. We should take all the women who hate sex and put them on an island where there is no men.
Never give up on your marriage. Sit down together and communicate. I have seen many marriages in which both partners despised one another, and now there marriages are so strong.
Get the movie ';Fireproof'; with Kirk Cameron and watch it TOGETHER. Please do this. You won't regret it.
Well you probably had good reasons to marry him, so its not like you are here by accident.
Tell him honestly about all your concerns, and give him time to change. You promised to do this in your marriage vows. After another 6 months if things are still the same, then move on. You gave it a shot, and gave him a chance. You will either end up with a great marriage, or your freedom. WIN-WIN.
you should not feel guilty, but why don't you concentrate on the things that made you fall in love with him.....nobody is perfect and if you can't get along in this marriage, what are you going to do the next time? how many times you want to get married?
So why did you get married?
Do you love him?
This is one good reason to stay with him.Everything could be changed in the future.Just talk to your husband more and make some nice plans for you together.
The easiest way is to give up.
Don't rush it at all!!! You really need to try to work at it and give this marriage a chance. Remember how it was in the beginning, try to work together and talk about your issues. Communication is everything!
Have you listened to the song ';50 ways to leave your lover';?
Life is too short, do what's best for you, he'll be alright.
Why are you even asking you answered every question that you need. Good Luck on your next relationship. Be thankful you didn't have children in this marriage count your blessing and move on.
for better or for worse huh?
try to work things out and dont be so materialistic. You had to have seen something in him when you decided to marry him, yes?
You should feel guilty for failing your marriage. But since you don't have any kids, go ahead. Give him a chance to be happy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtu17LRfU鈥?/a>
HOPE IT HELPS
What made you want to marry him in the first place?? y dont you talk to him about how you feel.
shure go ahead divorce, then be sure to get a portfolio on the next one before you tye the knot!
You must have married him for some reason. Why is that?
I am SO glad you don't have any kids.
YOu do sound immature. I would grow up if I were you.
You got be Asian?? Leave now better than later.
No loss at stake? Other than you're sanilty and peace of mind?
Leave. Forget guilt. That's what chocolate is for baby.
Why did you marry him in the first place?
Just some advice..... Be selfish... Make yourself happy!!!! Because if you don't no one will..... Good Luck!!
That you made a vow that says for better or for worse...til death do us part..
lol go ahead, I don't really care.
'til death do us part' my a-s-s, if you're not happy, why suffer? this life is too short to spend with someone that didn't help you enjoy life. but first of all, you have to look at the root of the problem, is it him that you're not attracted to? or do you have commitment issues and now that you're tied down you're trying to find negative things about him? if you really, genuinely don't want to be with this man, then don't be. i know sometimes we have to sacrifice for the happiness of others, but in cases like this, i say it's OK to be ''selfish'' and think of your own well being.. especially since you two don't have kids in the mix. trust me, I've watched too many beautiful people stay in a marriage they weren't happy in and it aged them and changed them for the worst.
did you have a prenuptial agreement?
good luck on this!! and get read for a fantastic single life with being FREE ;)
F*CK ''TIL DEATH DO US PART''... B-S... LIFE IS TOO SHORT!! BE FREE
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